Last Sunday, I called Verizon to see if I could test my line prior to the technician arriving. The woman was rude, speaking sarcastically with me: “How could we test the line before we’ve turned it on?”
Then she told me the technician would test it when he arrived for the all day appointment I had scheduled on Wednesday.
Waitaminute! The previous representative told me that they just flip a switch and he assured me I would not need to be home. I can’t be home on Wednesday. Even if I could be home, can’t you narrow it down beyond “All Day?”
No. They can’t.
I took the day off Wednesday to wait for Verizon to come install my DSL. (Somehow “self installation kit” doesn’t actually mean that). At 4:30PM, half an hour before the end of my 8 hour installation window, I called customer service.
Sir I’m sorry to inform you that the technician got held up at an earlier job, and we will be unable to install your service today.
I was steaming mad, but I kept my cool. I asked the representative what she could do to compensate me for wasting my entire day. She offered to waive the installation fee of $19.95. Then she offered discounted anti-virus software. Then she offered to sell me DirecTV. Then she asked me if I wanted to bundle my cell phone with the Verizon bill.
Strike 3. (Also the other 26 outs)
So I canceled my appointment and my account, destined to poach lousy service from my neighbor until the expiration of my Time Warner 45 day lockout. Then I decided, on a lark, to try signing up for Time Warner Extreme internet in my wife’s name. I’d been told it wouldn’t work, but what harm could it possibly do?
Monday morning, they will come and install Extreme internet between 10am and noon, a two hour window. Unbelievable.
Don’t fuck this up guys.